Article, Relationship


The most common way men start arguments is by invalidating a woman’s feelings or. Point of view. Men don’t realize how much they invalidate. 

For example,  a man may make light of a woman’s negative feelings. He might say “Ah,  don’t worry about it”.To another man this phase would seem friendly. But to a female intimate partner it is insensitive and hurts. 

A very common example is when a man has done something to upset a woman. His instinct is to make her feel better by explaining why she shouldn’t be upset. He confidently explains that he has a perfectly good, logical and rational reason for what he did. He has no idea that this attitude makes her feel as though she has no right to be upset. When he explains himself, the only message she may hear is that he doesn’t care about her feelings. 

Generally,  when a woman shares feelings of frustration, disappointment, or worry every cell in a mans body instinctively reacts with a list of explanations and justifications designed to explain away her upset feelings. A man never intends to make matters worse. His tendency to explain away feelings is just a man’s instinct. 

Inspired by the legendary John Gray..